Healing

Jeremiah 29:11 For I know the plans I have for you, declares the Lord, plans for welfare and not for evil, to give you a future and a hope.

God in His soft gentle way said to me, “As a child you were not safe, you were hurt.” He drew me into the reel to reel scenes as the movie projector played images of memories stored. God is taking me to the deepest darkest places of my heart to restore me as He whispered, “I have always loved you. Rest here and listen. You were never alone.” – pulling me closer to the stories like a flashlight in a darkened room.

Bringing light to the pain.... The pain and the secrets held deep inside the heart of a child and teenager. A heart hidden.
I’m beginning to realize I don’t have to understand my past or why pain had to happen or why children are abandoned and left on their own..... Why children are abused......Why children are not loved....

I heard a speaker one day say, “instead of writing off our past, or discounting it, we should authenticate the role it has played in our lives.” (Joyce Meyer)

I am learning that my God is a God who will heal my broken heart. He is trying to heal mine and if I give in and just allow him to....My life experiences have defined me and who I will become.

Because of my story: I can walk alongside wounded people and understand their pain.
Because of my story: I can be a child advocate and say I understand your sad and broken heart.
Because of my story: I can be a better mother.
Because of my story: I understand the tears of abandonment, abuse and broken spirits.
It is my choice whether or not to be angry or bitter by what I had to go through.

I understand now that my past has a purpose. Without the pain and the years of emptiness the story would be different and I would be different. I wouldn’t have a heart for the things above.

God is bringing me to a place of vulnerability and transparency to tell my story for it has not been an easy journey to open up and share.

I am becoming thankful God is taking my brokenness and is moving me into a place of beautiful healing.

I am learning when you suffer a soul piercing hurt there is no quick method of healing. It’s a journey with God and learning the strength required to heal is something much greater than I and must come from above. Not only is the journey itself a thing of beauty, but the way He uses that journey to bring Glory to Himself is beauty beyond words. Humble me God to share my brokenness to reveal something beautiful in someone else.